This is my 90th post!

And I’m thinking about starting a 356 project, you know where you get to share everyday something, till you complete the year!

I’ve known one or two of my friends that tried it out before; one of them writes, and the other shares photos. And I can tell that the moment they decided to start  it wasn’t that easy, but when they finally finished the year, it was a huge relief and an excellent legacy left behind. I kind of want this too.


Maybe I’ll decide that and actually do it starting tomorrow.


maybe, maybe not ..



As we all say goodbye to 2011.

Oh dear! 2011! where do I begin!!

One hell of a year! by all means, to all people, all around the world!

From day one, it has been a remarkable year for all the Egyptians, and it will always be remembered as the year that turned Egyptian politics upside down. and due to all the politics I’m studying right now, let’s skip that part! =D enough with politics already!!


So back to normal talks..

bitter – sweet” that is it for me!

I can’t recall the very beginning of the year that well, but there are some highlights that I can’t easily forget.


Starting from the moment (February 2011) we decided to start FREEDOM PAINTERS. I will be forever thankful I agreed on doing it, I’m grateful that I got to know these people, and got closer to others. I’m glad I was and still am a part of FP. ❤

All the experiences I had to go through for FP’s sake, and how amazingly their effect was on me; all the recordings, tv shows, having to manage people’s donations, etc ..


followed by THIS. this blog you’re looking at right now. The dream that I finally decided to pursue earlier this year. And although I did stuff I said I wouldn’t do like for example when I said I would never ever stop, but I did. I promised I would always keep it simple, but somewhere along the road, it got very complicated and it did bring me down. I said I’d always write to inspire others, but sometimes all I did was write to find myself, to inspire myself..


And then I came across, imEU. A life changing experience that is about to end in 4 months. An experience that I’d kill to have it all over again! It’s addictive. I will never get enough..

I have known some new people since last September to be exact, and it feels like a life time already! They are now an undeniable part of my daily life. People that I’d do everything in my power to always have them in my life.

OFA ’12, heads’12 and imEU 2012 are God’s blessings for the year =)



However, through out the year I had my ups and downs; very extraordinary ones! I experienced some very new stuff, met very exciting new people and finally went through totally different  moods. And Lets not talk about 2011 and my moods! because I wouldn’t know what to say exactly, but from one thing I’m sure; this year has taught me how to be “Titanium” as a very dear friend of mine always say. Just to prove another thing I didn’t know; you don’t know how strong you are until being strong is the only option.

Only when you have to be very strong and have to hold it together just to keep others going, when you have to pretend and fake and hide your fears, just to give them an extra push, only then, you experience true strength.

And when you inspire people and let them pursue their dreams, let them aim for higher goals, let them want more for themselves, that’s when you experience good leadership.

I thank God for the list of achievements of this year. And I intend to have an even longer one in 2012 isA. (:



And Through all of  this sweet shit, I almost lost a dear friend or two, and gained a few as well.

I let distance get between us, I let it happen as I stood watching. But the bright side is, – I think- that it is not over yet. I’m still on it – or at least i WILL. I’m sorry my friend.



And to the ones who made it this far, I will end my draft with some words of wisdom I learned this year:

The people that matter to you, let them always know that they do. always make them FEEL that way. don’t hold back anything you want to say to anyone, you will never know what could happen tomorrow. Life is short! It is. So stop calculating every single move you make, sometimes all you have to do is close your eyes and jump; you’ll never know until you try. Replace the fear of the unknown with “curiosity”. Always have faith in a new day, a better tomorrow. Follow your heart, live your life, and it doesn’t really matter if you get hurt or shatter into pieces, Time heals – when you decide to finally let go – all the scars that actually show you where you’ve been and where you are.


And finally, always remember to be HAPPY. Appreciate what you have – before it’s gone- because sometimes when you have something good, you’d better stop looking for something better.


And to all the people who challenged me, thank you for showing me that I can always do more. To those who deliberately gave up on me, thank you for making me realize that I don’t need anyone to be happy. Thank you all for making me realize that I deserve better.



N.B: and for those who want to do a TO-DO list today – I was one of them 2 hours ago, you don’t have to wait for 31-12 or 1-1 to write down what you want to BE and DO in the coming whole year! You should never tie “THIS” to a certain timing. You should decide, whenever you feel the need to, to end a past phase of your life, and mark the beginning of a new one, a more desired one.


Lets all hope for the best. Let’s hope for a better year, a year full of joy and happiness.

I only hope that God will  make my coming year a more promising one, a year that would teach me so much. A year full of new adventures.

A year that would show me, a new me. just like this one did..

Good night CAIRO!! It has been a pleasure writing to you for the past 4 months (:


N.B: I will be needing your prayers for the coming three weeks – Finals TAN TAN TAN! =D

Sometimes things make sense to me, and only me.

When you stand alone in the crowd, when you speak but dont really know if you’re heard, when you walk but never really get anywhere, you’re stuck.
You’re falling apart, it’s like you’re cracking inside, you can almost hear it.
You stand in silence.. nothing heard but the sound of your tears running down your face.
It’s so cold outside, it’s almost reflecting upon your soul.
You’re still standing still.
Everything stops.


You burst.
You cry in silence.. But it hurts inside.


You want so bad to be rescued, but you’re just way too far from anyone’s sight.

You see yourself as an insecure little creature standing alone. By now i think you realize, nothing is ever permenant.

and nothing is ever that easy.


“Silence ..”

My daily non-sense!

Nothing I do is good enough for me, NOTHING!

even when I stick to the plans I have made for myself, I still find something to blame myself for! ANYTHING!


I truly can’t understand! what the hell am I doing?!

how come when I am even up to my own expectations, I’m like ” maybe these expectations are low anyway..”



That’s why I never really feel the sense of achievement like expected.

I’m always left looking for more..

Before it all goes in vain.

It takes a wake-up call to know what you are about to lose.


I’m gonna need a lot of them- in the future- I know.


But until this moment, I’m glad I had one of “these conversations” today, and yesterday as well. (:

Yes! it IS a choice!

who said I needed someone to be happy?!


Happiness is a state of mind, you either fight for it, or give up easily, and blame it on whatever your mind comes up with.


just remember that NO ONE in this world leads a perfect life, they just decided to overlook the imperfections!


P.S ” YOU deserve to be happy (: ”


When I finally came clean ..

I lost count. I have failed so many important people in my life, that I stopped counting. I even know who am I going to fail next ..

Ironic isn’t it?! When you finally decide to try and fix one aspect of your life and then every other aspect decides to come tumbling down NOW! not later, but NOW!


we all know that giving up is always the easiest way out but never the right path to take.

And now All I have to do is, keep going, keep going and keep on dragging my pieces behind, all the shattered ones.

Isn’t that the way we all learn our lessons?



” Till I reach the end of the tunnel… “


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